need sleep but i'm not tired ! oh well...*shrugs shoulders* :)

Okay today we had a retirement party to go to for a friend that retired today...and yesterday's schedual was as followed:

1. get up clean kitchen.

2. Attempt to clean room, got a little bit done..go me ! :D

3. uhh what else i know i had a schedual listed in my head...ohh that is right, I shaved my chin.

4. Took a shower.

5. Worked on my summer ccourse for my animation major.

6. Then attepted to clean room again ! lol :)

7. watched some anime.

8. worked on class again (sketched for one of my story boards)

9. Went to a Japanese restuarant, which was soo good and fabulous, next time i'm asking for chop skicks at the beginning ;) lol :)

10. Came home and fiddled on the computer, plus checked mail for any emails for my class.

11. Talked to mandi for a bit and my big sis, you know who you are ;) :)

12. And then mandi came over to pick me up and we hanged at her house for a good three-three and half hours.

13. Came home and worked on a banner for the friend that we went to the retirement party for. spent about five and half hours on the banner painting it and painting the background to take away the nasty white background. Got done with it at about five thirdy, started on it after i came back from mandi's which was around midnight. Soo bacially i've had only two hours of sleep and i'll explain why i have had only two hours of sleep...

a. I didn't acually go to bed til around six.

b. I got up at around eight to go to the store with mom soo i could help her with the shopping for the retirement party.

c. surpisingly enough i didn't take one, got that, not one nap today. Been going all day..sat down maybe at the most three times. and took a shower.

Soo here i am now...still awake at about 11:51pm almost midnight and i haven't had but two hours of sleep and i have been going most of the day and half of the day yesterday, the other half yesterday i was working on my storyboards for my class because the ideas were just coming at me like humming bird right after the other ! lol :) Goal to get all my story boards an all my sketching and drawing portion of the class done in two weeks, hopefully ! ;D :D Hmm...I wonder what kind of Final Fanasty character i would be...?? *goes to find a quiz to take too see* :D
  • Current Music
    Larger Than Life by the Backstreet Boys :)

That special someone :D

I was just thinking today, that it seems that everyone I know has found someone they have fell in love with and then it just didn't work out but they found someon else later down the road. I guess what I'm getting at is that, I still haven't found anyone to really like and hang out with, as in a boy. I know, I know, those kinds of things just happen and you have to be patient with it, I am's just well, I've never been kissed and it's not taht i'm rushing that either....more than anything i want to be held, and just sit outside and look at the stars and just talk about everything and anything with him, I want to meet him in the most unusal of places, or in a funny situation, or in an unique way. I don't know why I was thinking about this, it's just that well it seems everyone has had a bf soo far, and maybe right now they dont have a bf, maybe they need to take a break from men all together, but i dont know what it feels like to have someone like that. I knows it's not werid to never have a bf at my age, it's different for everyone, but I thought that by now i would have had at least one person that would be able to hold me, and just tell me funny stories and we could just visit fun places like the Zoo and just go to the park and just swing in the swing set and then just sit down at the waters edge and just stare at the water and just enjoy the time we were spending with each other. I think that i might have found a song that might be for me and that sorta describes me, but that totally, lol :) IT's titled I Think I Love You, but it sorta describes what I have had felt at one time. I dont know if i ever loved a man, i know i have had soo many crushes it's soo insane but none of those turn out to be a boy that i didn't date later. And believe it or not I have scared a boy away from me before, I think I either smiled too much, was too weird for him, was too excited all the time, too happy all the time, or just was around him too much, lol :) What is with this feeling, I want to find that special someone before i start my career, but at the same time i dont want to bother with this sorta of thing while i'm trying to finish school and then afterwards i'll have to find a job to helpe me pay off college. I just dont know what to do, it's just a werid feeling, I just can't decide what i want, I'm always changeing my mind, first i want to find that special somone and then i dotn and just want to concentrate on my education and then I just want to be here with my friends and just enjoy the time i have at home away from school for a while and not really worry about anything and if someone happens to come into my life then that is fine and if the dont that is fine as well. It's just soo annoying the way I change my mind like that but then that is me, that is the way I am, i cna't help it, I'll amit that i'm it's just me :D lol :) I just want to know what it feels like to have someone specail close to my heart, i want to know what the feeling is of being held close to his heart and hearing it beating hard and steadly against his chest. I just ...I'm not sure what excally i want. And at first i thought that I might have found myself, but it looks like that i might not have. I 'm not sure about things is just soo I dont know what words to use. I lay in my bed at night and just think about the past, the present and the future, what will happne in five years, where will i be, who will i be with, will i be with anyone, will haveing someone like that in my life affect my furture and dreams? Soo many questions, and the only one that can answer them is myself, lol, but i'm not even sure if i can answer them, they are afterall questions with unknow answers. Man, I need to get some more new icon's soo I'm not always using the same old one all the time! lol :) oh well *shrugs shoulders* :) :D
  • Current Music
    Every Heart (Inuyasha theme song)

The things you find at the dollar store! :O Anime ! omg ! :) :D

OMG! Okay I knew that the dollar store close to me had anime, as in DBZ and YU-Gi-Oh, but when me and my mom went up today to one i was looking at the dvd's, just like I always do, and there, behold the wonder of anime! They had Ronin Warriors, Gundam Wing Endless Waltz, and Scrapped Princess! I was soo excited! And like a dumb ass when my mom asked me if there was anything that I wanted and I was like no..and she was like well do you want that candle, because before i had found a strawberry short cake candle and it smelled soo good!, but anyways, i said okay to the candle, but at the same time was thinking about the 3 dollar anime dvds! three dollars..count, two, three! lol :) and like a stuipd ass I said no and then later on when i was talking to my adotped big sis and friend Mandi mom was like what are you talking to mandi about and i told her and how i wanted the anime shows and she was like.."now i'm mad at you, I told you if there was anything you wanted or needed to just get it" and i didn't know what to say,lol. I mean she wasn't like really mad but I guess that i should have gotten the anime, lol :) and she told me that next time we're there if i wanted something like to just get it, lol :) I was like, Okay, in this little like whinper sorta voice, lol :) But yeah, i soo should have picked up Gundam Wing Endless Waltz and Ronin Warriors, both for three dollars and could have gotten them both for six dollars, plus tax of cource ;) lol, and I would have save soo much! but now i can't wait to get them ! I hope they still have them the next time i'm up there ! *hopes and wishes with everything she has!* :) And mom said that if that is what i want, the anime dvd's, then she would help me out and pay me some money for doing the dishes, and cleaning the house, you know, the basic things you do around the house, and i was like, okay. She told me to save my money i have now for getting new cloths, soo i wasn't going to argue with her, because i don't know about your guy's mom's but with my mom, when you argue, well you get no where and she always gets her way ;) :) lol Soo i knew not to argue with her ;):) lol Soo now i'm happy...I went to the dentist today and found out that i have no cavities, and that even though I will be getting my wisdom teeth taken out today was a very good day! got to spend it with my mom and then we got to eat dinner together and chat and then I found anime for a super cheap price, anime that was on dvd for a super cheap price! soo today was such a good day! yeah! I'm soo glad! *smiles happily! :) And i just love this music video that i have on..well i'm more or less listening to the song that is used in it but i love the music video too ...I got it off of AMV, and it's a Gundam Wing music video set to Godsmacks song I Stand ALone, that song makes such a great gundam wing music video, the action and the poses the characters do fit the song soo good ! and the action..oh man the action in it !! soo nice! :) Go Gundam on forever ! :) :D Well i guess that is it for now....i had a great day and am soo happy and i have great music! ohh i just found the cutest music video for the anime show Kyo Kara Maoh! And I thank my big sis Cancan for telling me about it and my friend that is letting me borrow the dvds for letting me borrow them (you know who you are ;)) , thank you guys soo much! :) Anyways..the video is set to the song I Thnk I Love You and i have never heard of the song but now that i have watched the music video i love the song and soo love the video, it's about Yuri and Wolfram's love! it's soo cute and just great! Long live yaoi! :)
  • Current Music
    I Stand Alone (by Godsmack) :)

what music and strong emotions can do to you ;)

This is what i came up with while be really emotional and listening to the song Broken: of course it's not spelled checked or anything like's fresh and right straight from what i was feeling at the time i was listening to Broken ;) :)

death? faith? hope? What do these words have in common, do they have anything in common? What is it with humans and the use of the word, death, faith, and hope? Faith, it's the will to keep on's a type of believe. What about hope? what is that word ment to be used for? It is a word used for situations such as haveving hope in the human heart, haveing hope that things will turn out okay and that haveing hope that people with dark hearts will in time change their ways...haveing hope menas to not give up on yourself, on anything you believe is also a believe, but it's the act of going on ...on preservering... on noting giving in to the evil that lurks around and within us all... we all hve some sort of bad side but it's our choice whether we let that bad site control us and to just give up and hide within our hearts the true person we want to become and want to live up to the name of. in order to have faith and hope a person has to keep on liveing..soo that brings us to the word death, it means to ceise to exist, it means that your heart has stop beating that you are among the dead, you have gone to that place where light shines the most brighest in the whole universe. So death, in a sense of faith and hope is just a easy way out of a hard or difficult situation that everyone faces at some point of time in their life. We face all sorts of situations, death of another loved one, death of a pet, a friend, of just about everything. If a person has enough faith or hope they can preceiver and they can go on liveing, liveing with the knowledge that they overcame the pain, that the didn't let the pain rule them and take the down with it. that in the end pain does come and go but it's up the the person to decide wheather they want the paint to stay and take them down with it or go let it go and overcome it and to live, live for themselves and for a live that will be filled with jounery's and adventures of a life time. People have the will and freedom to choose what they want to do with their lives...ti's up to them and them alone to choose what they want to do with their lives, live or die?

that is what happens when you mix a little of music, a little of emotions and bam! you get a whole damn load of questions and thoughts. Tada! :)
  • Current Music
    The Way

What the fuck is wrong with me that i can't get hired ! ? ??? Warning , a rant ;)

Well summer is going perfectly, yeah ..let me tell ya, i got this great job and i'm starting to pay on my car and....and you really want to know the truth, my summer is sucking as far as having a job and having the money to pay for the things that i should have for my car, and i can only drive it this summer with one of my parents in it with me! And i would happier if i had a nice job, it doesn't have to be perfect just a plain job that pays decent but can i even have that ?! fuck no! why you ask? ;) well simple, i guess the suckers at the places i applied to don't want some amiture to work there and screw everything up ;) Or it could be that they dont feel like training someone that doesn't know the job to do the job or it could be that i'm not business enough to take the job and don't have enough style in cloths to dress right for any of the I forgetting anything?? :D Oh I know, it could be because also that some people dont know how to run a comany and that they just have no clue of what is going on and what the hell they are going to do soo their wasteing my time and they are just making me wait of which i dont need to to do of which i'm not going to do, and i'm going to say screw it and just try to get on at a tshirt company ;) I mean come on people, i know that I'm not very stylish when it comes to dressing nice and all ...but come one you can tell when someone is putting some effort into it !!*flares arms around wildly!* I mean jezzz...i'm soo fuckin sorry that i'm not going out there and buying like a fuckin 100 dollar suite to just impress you damn people ! *screams!* I tried to get a job at the beginning and I tried to apply to some places during this past Spring break, well guess my application wasn't good enough or the interview i went to wasn't good enough, i didn't have enough experience ;) and they say they will keep my file on hand til they find a position that will open up for me, bull shit..that is what i say to that ...they just sugar coat those damn sorry letters to make you feel better...when in acuality it's someone with more experince coming in and taking the job and yes that does make sesne but sometimes those that have more experience sometimes don't use it to the full potential that and it's a possiblity that they may not work as hard and ...what the fuch is going on....i mean i must have filled out at least six or seven applications this summer and out of the six or seven i only got called in once for an interview that i thought i felt i did pretty damn good in and that i wasn't trying to be too positive about the was hopeing...just hopeing just a tiny bit that i might get it! but could i ...ohhh noo...cause less just make this summer a whole bunch more fun for lindsey ...i mean you's not that i haven' anything else to do other than trying to motivat my sorry ass to work on my summer class for my animatoin major, which i must say i didn't get some research done today soo i'm happy about that and some sctechy done on my Kareoke room, soo at least something a tiny bit happy happened today ;) :) And for those of you out there that have a job extremely happy and lucky that you have a job, i dont care if it's baby sitting at least you have a job that is paying you money, at least you are getting money in, i dont care if your baby sitting for your mom and dad at least your getting paid people ! :D I work my ass off in school and get good grades and positive compliments from the professor's but for some odd reason, when it comes to finding a job i screw it up somehow someway and i have no fuckin clue how i am doing that either ! *sighs.* at least one good thing is true, i have my mom and my friend mandi and my friend Tonda and my dad to help me destress....well when i get to see them or when we go out and do something...soo that is one thing i can be happy about but when i get back to my room and look at my class book i am reminded that i have a class to finish by auguest first and that when i look at my bank book i am remind that i have to pay the school the money i owe them by the first of auguest as well ;) soo yeah..i'm having all sorts of luck this i really??? fuck no! hahahah ! And some people might think that i am stressing out too much, okay maybe i am ... but excuse the fuck out of me if i'm not like everyone else and excuse the fuck out of me if I don't act like everyone else and have some of their traits... i am me and i act the way i do because that is who i am and that is the way i act when i'm stressed, happy, angery all the above. I act different when i am in the emotion modes than someone else! :) Sooo in closeing i would like to say that in this newest rant and rave of mine, i didn't not intend to insult or piss anyone off and if i did in posting this lj then i'm sorry but i had to get this out somehow and it's like two in the morning and i really dont want to be complaining to anyone one on one about this because i know that mandi has heard enough of it from me already and i dont think she needs my whinning ass anymore whinning to her like a little child, soo i'm doing this instead, besides i'm due to post another lj anyway and why not make it as long as i can to make up for the time i haven't been posting, right ;) Well i feel :) happy days everyone and on that note i'm am out of here ! *goes to read some lovely fanfiction and then it's off to watch the second part to Tokyo Babylon*

Want the Clow Book ! :)

OMG! I soo want the Clow Book! The cards look like the real Clow cards and they even have the key that Sakura uses to call forth her magickal wand!:) I just found it on the net on a site and it's only like about 20 dollars, but the thing is I dont have a credit card and if I did I'm not sure if I would get it still...I would be like, ohh but the credit card is for emergency, lol:)

go, take a look at the fabulous thing that is the Clow Book, I want ;) :)
  • Current Music
    True Light (D.N. Angel Theme song ! soo good ! :)

Updating....finally! :)

okay ...well this week would have been okay but I got to spend time with the Mandos ! Totally cool and a lot of fun! Plus we got to go to a Celtic festival and it was my first and we had a lot of fun and I found my first quartz!:) And then we swam a little later that day and I got to see horsey that day too ! it was a lot of fun ! Man I have't updated in forever ! lol . What else, well today it was soo windy ! And I just loved it! The Wind is my favorite element, and if i could bend it, like they do in the Avatar: The Last Air Bender, I soo be a Air bender or a Water bender or if i could be both I would be both! :) But I just love the air and the water..ohh man i love to swim ! :) Ohh and I'll be celebrating Midsummer with the Mandos too! So I'm really excited about that and soo can't wait ! :) Got some new addictions recently, coursety of YouTube, lol :) The first one is titled Suksyo/ho, and it's a anime yaoi and is soo cute ! and my second addiction is Black Cat, it's an awsome anime and i can't wait to see what the dubbed version sounds like....and we all can't forget about Ultra Maniac! That is such a cute anime and it has witches in it gets extra points for having witches in it ;) :) And then my other addiction comes in manga's called I'm No Angel and then the other manga that i'm addicted to is Fushgi Yugi Genbu kaiden! soo good ! :) and I gotta thank the Mandos for taking me to the Celtic fest. because if it wasn't for her I probably wouldn't have gotten my first quartz as soon as i did ! soo Thank you mandi ! :) *hugs tightly!* :) Also I soo miss my big sis, Miss you Kelly ! *hugs tightly!* :) Also I miss my other big sis Cancan, miss you big sis ! Miss you Cancan! *hugs tightly!* And right now i'm soo wanting to buy the whole thing of the Thundercats on dvd becauwse that is such an awsome cartoon and is soo a classic ! :) ohh and i'm wanting to get Heman on dvd too ! that is out on dvd and I'm just soo excited that all the old cartoons are starting to come out on dvd ! it is a great time for me..i'm such a lover of old cartoons the old X-Men cartoon! with Jubilee and Gambit ! :) Ohh and then the third X-Men is soo good ! i can't wait to buy it when it comes out on dvd ! :) and I can't wait to see the Second Resident Evil ! the first one wasn't too bad and the second looks pretty good ! and omg ! I was at K-Mart the one day with my parents and I decovered that they have Avatar: The Last Air Bender there on dvd with exras for only 12.99 ! that is cheap for something that is sorta new ! I just dotn know what to buy with the minium amound of money i'll have this summer to spend, lol...well first i have to take fifty dollars and get me some nice and comfortable pants and then it's anime time and manga time to ! ;):) I should just make a list of the top like five or eight dvd's i want this summer and just stick with them! becaue if i make a list of everything i want this summer i'll end up using all the money i earn this summer and i need that money for other things....though I wish i could somehow win like 1,000 dollars, that would be nice...and i could have me a anime and manga shopping spree ! hehe :) And! I still need to see the Gravitation OVA and I can't wait for Kyo Kara Moah to come out in a boxset form, and I'm hopeing it won't take forever but knowing my luck, it might, lol :) but by that time i'll have saved up a lot of money and that way i can afford or maybe i should make a collecter container to collect money here and there for the boxset...but then i need to start collecting money to get the two boxsets of Fushgi Yugi too ! uggg ! too much anime and manga out and too litte of money we need to use to get all the anime and manga out there ! *sighs* *shoulders slump* ...ohh well....."ooohh cruel is the world, but i have caborken scarf, around my kneck!* :D Well that is it for now .....later skaters! and next time on my updat....well who knows....*shrugs shoulders* :) I love all my friends and sisters and family members! :) take care guys ! :) *Waves happyly to all the nice people!* :)
  • Current Music
    Stray Cat Strut
Funny chrno

Flash, sometimes you love it..and sometimes you jsut HATE it!

Okay here it goes! I have to work with this program called Flash for my little animation thingy for my animation 2 class, right? Well the damn thing is giving me shit and frankly i'm just sick of it! lol ...I've been working my ass off this past week and this weekend to get the damn thing done and i spent three hours in this lab , three hours straight on the computer and if it wasn't for my music i brought down with me i would have gone nuts, completely nuts on friday ! lol :)Hmmm....Godsmack *listens to a Gundam wing music video with the song I Stand Alone going* This music video just rocks ! and the music soo goes with the action that is happening in the music video to ! :) Well i just felt like speaking my mind and just getting this agrivation off my chest ;) lol I can't wait til this semester is over with ! *metally bags head on computer lab desk!* Okay ..i'm going to go now and just surf the net to calm down ;) later skaters ! :) *Waves!*
  • Current Music
    Godsmack "I Stand Alone* a rocking song ! ;)
Funny chrno

A Little Thankx :)

A Little Thanks ^^
If there is someone on your Friends List who makes your world a better place just because that person exists and who you would not have met (in real life or otherwise) without the internet, then post this same sentence in your journal.

My big sis: Yes, you are right, If you would have never wrote the Fruits Basket story we woudn't have met and you wouldn't have gotten me soo hooked on awsome and funny animes ! :) Thank you ! :) I really miss our late night chats as well and I enjoyed helping you out with your stories, it was really fun bouncing idea's off of each other ! :) You'll always be my big sis too, doesn't matter how much we chat, I just want you to be happy and take care of yourself and let no one tell you what to do or how to do something ;) :D Really miss you! Because of you I'm now totally into yaoi and have a few manga's of it... soo I just wanted to say Thany you soo much, you have opened up my world and I love you for that and for being soo nice and helpful and a awsome big sis to me ! :) *hugS*
  • Current Music
    humming of the computers in the DMC lab
Cat Shuichi

Without the net I woulndn't have met... :)

THankx big sis ! For that sweet message on your lj! I miss you soo much ! and I will always consider you my big sis as well! :) *hugs tightly!*

If there is someone on your Friends List who makes your world a better place just because that person exists and who you would not have met (in real life or otherwise) without the internet, then post this same sentence in your journal.

Big sis: And you know who you are. And your right, without that Fruits Basket story we would have never met and I would have never got addicted to Gravitation either ! ;) lol :) And I loved those late nights we spent talking and going over your stories. I miss you soo much and I thank the deities each and every day that you wrote that story and we met. :) You are on my list and you are the first person I met on the net that is on my list, and I can't wait to talk to you again! (and about those updates, it's cool, writing takes some time sometimes too just update when you got the time, I undertand that you get busy and are busy a lot sometimes, soo no worries big sis *hugs!*) Anyways, without the net I wouldn't hvae met my big sis and without her my grammer wouldn't have became as improved as it is now and my stories wouldnt' be up like they are now without her editing, well minus one story that I posted before I met her, but after I met her she did such a fabulaous job on editing my stories. Thank you for everything big sis ! Miss you lots and love you lots too ! :) Have a great day and be safe ! :) my user pic is for you big sis, enjoy ! lol Shuichi is soo funny in that pic ..lmao !! :) later big sis ! *waves!*
  • Current Music
    The Rock (from So Weird)